Brandon Martel

As the new year begins, so do the time of new year’s resolutions, where we promise ourselves that this will be the year to eat healthier, work out more or spend more time with our families. But the stats are clear, not even 10% of those who set resolutions feel that they have successfully accomplished them at the end of the year, and only a quarter make it through the first month. That’s why we’ve written this blog post, so that whether you’re looking to get lean, or read your Bible more, you have the right strategies to get you there.

1. Set the right goals: You’ll have your best shot of completing your resolution if you ensure that it is the right goal for you. Avoid goals that are societally put on you, but instead seek God’s wisdom in deterring that you should work on this year.
Your goals should be smart — and SMART. That’s an acronym to help set the right goals.
Specific. Your resolution should be absolutely clear. Instead of just saying that you want to read your Bible more, clearly state how much of your Bible you’d like to read and what time interval.
Measurable. This goes right along with being specific. Create the goal so that you can measure whether or not you are achieving the goal. Make use of journals and notes to note what you have accomplished as the year goes on.
Achievable. Stretch yourself, but don’t choose a goal that won’t be able to actually be achieved realistically. Choosing goals that are too big can lead to frustration and irritation. You can always start smaller and then increase the goal as the year goes on.
Relevant. Is this a goal that really matters to you, and are you making it for the right reasons?
Time-bound. Creating a goal that has a schedule with a clear end date will ensure that the goal doesn’t just occur in perpetuity. This will also assist in measuring the success of the goal.

2. Make a plan: Break your goals down into smaller, more manageable tasks, and create a plan for how you will accomplish each of them. This will help you stay focused and motivated. For example, if you want to lose weight, you will have to focus on both physical activity and nutrition. Creating a plan will have you outlining how you will get the appropriate physical activity (the gym, walks, sports, etc) and the right nutrition (meal planning, dieticians, etc).

3. Use cues and triggers: Identify specific cues or triggers that can help you remember to practice your new habit. For example, you might set an alarm on your phone to remind you to meditate each day, or you might put a note on your fridge to remind you to eat a healthy snack.

4. Be consistent: The more consistently you practice your new habit, the more likely it is to stick. So make an effort to practice your resolution every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes.

5. Celebrate your progress: Don’t forget to celebrate your progress as you work towards your goals. This can help you stay motivated and can make it easier to stick to your new habit.

6. Seek support: Consider enlisting the help of a friend or a professional coach to hold you accountable and offer guidance and encouragement as you work towards your goals. Make sure to remain honest with them about your successes and your failures.

7. Be flexible: Life is unpredictable, and it’s okay if your plans don’t always go as expected. Be open to adjusting your goals or your approach as needed, and remember that progress, not perfection, is what’s important.

8. Seek help from God: He can give you the wisdom you need to accomplish your goals. Psalm 32:8 reminds us “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.”

Overall, the key to achieving your New Year’s resolutions is to be patient, persistent, and consistent, and to stay focused on your goals even when faced with challenges or setbacks.

All Nations Church is pleased to announce that we will once again be presenting The Living Nativity here in Sudbury for our 35^th anniversary! The Nativity will occur nightly at Science North from December 21^st to the 24^th, with the presentation starting at 7:30 and the venue opening at 6:30. There is no cost to attend but we invite all attendees to come early, look at the beautiful Christmas lights put up by the Sudbury Charities Foundation and donate to that important cause.

Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, many in the community were not able to experience this Christmas tradition these last few years so we are excited to provide this gift to the Sudbury community. This year we will go back to our original format with outdoor seating at the original location of Science North. We are also excited to announce our partnership with KFM Radio 95.5 to bring a special fireworks display to Greater Sudbury on Christmas Eve at the conclusion of our presentation.

There are a number of surprises coming to the Living Nativity this year. We have provided a facelift for our trailer with brand new murals painted by local artist Christy Smith, new music with an original song from Sarah Craig and many more surprises!

We wish to thank our other important community partners like Science North, McCullagh-Hall, TESC and of course, all of the volunteers that put countless hours into making this event continue year after year.

Make plans to be with us this Christmas season!

Adapted from material from The American Psychiatric Association, The Mental Health Commission of Canada and The Mental Health Foundation

Over the last number of years, media reports have abounded with the epidemic that mental illness and poor mental health has become, especially with our younger generations. The statistics are clear: “An estimated 1.2 million children and youth in Canada are affected by mental illness—yet, less than 20 per cent will receive appropriate treatment. By age 25, approximately 20 per cent of Canadians will have developed a mental illness (https://ymhc.ngo/resources/ymh-stats/) and “Among children and youth aged 5 to 17, 17% reported poor or fair mental health” (https://www.statcan.gc.ca/o1/en/plus/907-youth-mental-health-spotlight-again-pandemic-drags).

While we all may want to help those struggling, especially our children and teens, it’s sometimes difficult to know what to do or even know what mental health/illness is. This post will provide some information about the different ebetween mental health and mental illness, what some common disorders are and what you can do for your student to help them.

What is Mental Health & Mental Illness
Mental illnesses are health conditions involving significant changes in thinking, emotion, or behaviour (or a combination of these). Mental illnesses are associated with distress and/or problems functioning in social, work, or family activities. Many people who have a mental illness do not want to talk about it. But mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of! It is a medical condition, just like heart disease or diabetes. And mental illnesses are treatable. We now know much more about how the human brain works, and treatments are available to help people successfully manage mental illnesses. Mental illness does not discriminate; it can affect anyone regardless of one’s age, gender, income, social status, race/ethnicity, religion/spirituality, sexual orientation, background, or other aspect of cultural identity. While mental illness can occur at any age, three-fourths of all mental illness begins by age 24. On the other hand, “mental health” is a concept similar to “physical health”: it refers to a state of well-being. Mental health includes our emotions, feelings of connection to others, our thoughts and feelings, and being able to manage life’s highs and lows. The presence or absence of a mental illness is not a predictor of mental health; someone without a mental illness could have poor mental health, just as a person with a mental illness could have excellent mental health.

Common Mental Illnesses
Mental illnesses take many forms. Some are fairly mild and only interfere in limited ways with daily life, such as certain phobias (abnormal fears). Other mental illnesses are so severe that a person may need care in a hospital. The following are short descriptions of some common mental illnesses:

Anxiety Disorders
Anxiety is a reaction to fear or stress. Everyone feels anxious sometimes, such as when speaking in front of a group or taking a test. A person may feel his/her heart beating faster, or may be short of breath or feel sick. Normal anxiety can usually be controlled and does not last much longer than the situation that triggers it. When anxiety becomes excessive, involves unfounded dread of everyday situations, and interferes with a person’s life, it may be an anxiety disorder. Nearly 30% of people will experience an anxiety disorder at some time in their lives. Anxiety disorders take many forms like panic disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder, social anxiety disorder, phobias and generalized anxiety disorder.

Depression
Depression is a potentially serious medical condition that affects how a person feels, thinks, and acts. The primary signs of major depression are that the person feels sad or has no interest or pleasure in normal activities for most of 2 weeks. Activities such as eating, socializing, sex, or recreation lose their appeal. Other symptoms include changes in appetite, sleep changes, agitation, restlessness, or changes in motor movement, feelings of worthlessness or guilt, problems thinking, concentrating, or making decisions, lack of energy, fatigue and thoughts of death or suicide. Depression is more intense and long-lasting than normal sadness. It can develop slowly, draining the energy, pleasure, and meaning from a person’s life. Like anxiety, depression can take different forms such as major depressive disorder, persistent depressive disorder and postpartum depression.

Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder can cause dramatic mood swings, from feeling high and energetic to feeling very low, sad, and hopeless. The periods of highs and lows are called episodes of mania or hypomania (lower grades of mania) and depression. During a manic episode, a person may speak rapidly, feel little need for sleep, and become involved in activities with a high potential for risk or pain. During a depressive episode, a person may feel despair, hopelessness, or fatigue. People with bipolar disorder are at higher risk than the general population for alcohol or substance misuse.

Schizophrenia
Schizophrenia is a chronic serious mental illness that usually begins in a person’s 20s. When untreated, it can cause people to have psychotic thinking (impaired perception of reality and ability to communicate), delusions (fixed, false beliefs), or hallucinations (seeing or hearing things that aren’t real). Some people with schizophrenia do not recognize that they have a mental illness. Treatment can help relieve many symptoms of schizophrenia, but most people with this illness cope with symptoms their entire lives. Nonetheless, many people with schizophrenia live successfully in their communities and lead rewarding lives.

Post-traumatic Stress Disorder
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can occur after a person has experienced or witnessed a situation involving harm or the threat of harm. People with PTSD may startle easily or be unable to feel positive emotions. They may experience flashbacks of the event that triggered the disorder and be quick to anger.

Addiction/Substance Use Disorders
Addiction is a chronic brain disease that causes compulsive substance use despite harmful consequences. As a result of research, we now know more about how addiction affects the brain and behavior. Addictive Disorders, including substance use disorders and gambling disorder, are mental illnesses defined in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders
(DSM-5®). People take drugs for a variety of reasons—to feel good, to feel better (for example, overcome distressing feelings), to do better, out of curiosity, or because peers are doing it. An initial decision to take drugs is usually voluntary, but with continued use changes take place in the brain impairing a person’s self-control and judgment.

Warning Signs of Mental Illness
-Often talking or writing about death, dying, or suicide when these actions are out of the ordinary
-Making comments about being hopeless, helpless, or worthless
-Expressions of having no reason for living; no sense of purpose in life; saying things like “It would be better if I wasn’t here” or “I want out”
-Increased alcohol and/or drug use
-Withdrawal from friends, family, and community
-Dramatic mood changes
-Changes in behaviour (Sleep, appetite, grades, etc)

What can you do to help
-Be informed. Learn what you can about mental health and how to best support your child.
-Begin discussions early. Don’t wait until it’s too late to talk to your teen about mental health and the resources available to them.
-Emphasize you care for them. Many of those struggling with mental illnesses feel alone, and may just want to know that you’re there for them.
-Don’t try to diagnose or second guess their feelings. You probably aren’t a medical expert and, while you may be happy to talk and offer support, you aren’t a trained counsellor. Try not to make assumptions about what is wrong or jump in too quickly with your own diagnosis or solutions.
-Let them share as much or as little as they want to. Don’t put pressure on them to tell you anything they aren’t ready to talk about. Talking can take a lot of trust and courage. You might be the first person they have been able to talk to about this.
-Keep questions open ended. Say “Why don’t you tell me how you are feeling?” rather than “I can see you are feeling very low”. -Try to keep your language neutral. Give the person time to answer and try not to grill them with too many questions.
-Talk about self-care. Talk about ways of de-stressing or practicing self-care and ask if they find anything helpful. Exercising, having a healthy diet and getting a good nights sleep can help protect mental health and sustain wellbeing.
-Take appropriate action. Don’t hesitate to remove possible means of self-harm or forbid isolation if you’re worried they may be suicidal.
-Seek professional help. Your family doctor will be your primary method to get them more assistance and referrals for your child.
-Set aside alone time with your child. Find activities you can do together, and guard time with them. As they get older, this will be incredibly important.
-Avoid taking on all the load. It’s easy to try to solve all your child’s problems in your home but take note of your limits. Don’t try to handle the enormity of your child’s pain and struggle alone.
-Rely on and point your child back to God. God is there for us, through everything in our lives. Pray for wisdom and help and pray with your child as well.

Resources you can use
https://kidshelpphone.ca/ – Anonymous and confidential communication with individuals who can assist with mental health issues. There are online, text and phone call options. This is for those 18 and under.
https://mindyourmind.ca/ – interactive tools and innovative resources to build capacity and resilience
https://brave-online.com – An interactive, online and evidence-based cognitive behavioural therapy program with complementary programs for parents
https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/therapists – A resource for finding therapists in the Sudbury area
https://ementalhealth.ca – A directory of mental health services and educational information
Family Doctors – These can often be the first point of contact to getting medication or referrals to psychologists. You can find a family doctor at https://www.ontario.ca/page/find-family-doctor-or-nurse-practitioner
https://www.mindbeacon.com/ – Free guided therapy from the Ontario government
211 – Information and referral for community, government, social and health services, including mental health resources across Ontario.
https://bouncebackontario.ca/ – free skill-building program managed by the Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA).
https://www.connexontario.ca/en-ca/ – Assistance to find assistance with mental health issues and addiction concerns
1.833.456.4566, or text them at 45645 – Talk Suicide Canada can assist with crises you may find yourself in.
911 – If there is a crisis, emergency services may be required

How’s your prayer life? It’s a simple question, but it can be tough to answer. Literally it sounds like, “How has talking to God been lately?” Emotionally it might feel like, “Sum up your relationship with God at this point in your life.” Last week we talked about reading your bible, we talked about how to properly study the bible. Bible reading, compared to prayer, is clearer and more “objective.” How many pages? How far along in your plan? Which books have you been reading? What have you learned? Prayer doesn’t fit into an Excel sheet quite as easily. For me, if I’m being honest, I can say that sometimes my prayer life hasn’t been the greatest. Sometimes I don’t feel like praying, or I’ve felt like I haven’t had time… sometimes I don’t even know what to say. It doesn’t matter how long I seem to come in my walk with God, there’s always times when prayer is difficult.
And yet, the bible tells us time and time again that prayer is one of the most important things that we can do. You probably feel as insecure about your prayer life as you feel about anything. Prayer might be, at the same time, the most pivotal and most puzzling activity in the Christian life. It is the lifeline and life-mystery for believers. We know we need to pray, but we know we don’t pray enough.
I’ve learned that everyone seems to be an expert at something. I have been to chocolate factories and learned things I never knew before from the people who make the chocolate.   I have found out from junior high students, that getting help on a video game is just a quick YouTube search away! I know a high school student who wants to work in the film industry and knows a crazy amount about most movies made in the last 10-15 years. And I don’t have to look very far to find some people who know more statistics about sports than I ever thought possible.

What about you? Think for a minute. If I were to ask your friends and family what topic you have some crazy amount of knowledge in or experience with, what would they say? When you have a question, who do you ask? That person at work who seems to know how to do everything, isn’t just a great coworker but they’re also someone who would probably be the perfect person to ask if you had a question about your job. If you want to improve in your parenting, maybe you ask that friend who seems to have their kids under control all the time. Or maybe you just want to cook that super good meal, so asking your neighbour who makes the most delicious food is the best bet. But if we’re being honest, those people around us are not always the best people to seek out for advice.

Think back over these options again. Have questions about your job? I would guess your manager or supervisor might be a great person to ask. What about truly improving in your parenting? A parenting expert would probably be the best person to ask for tips and direction. And with cooking, you could probably get the best advice from a professional chef. So, who do we seek out when we have questions about God? Sure, you might say a pastor or an elder. But, why not just ask Jesus?! That’s what the disciples did. We can learn for ourselves by reading how He answered their requests.

Luke 11:1, New Living Translation:

Once Jesus was in a certain place praying. As he finished, one of his disciples came to him and said, “Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples.”

There are so many times we read about Jesus trying to find a place away from the crowds to pray. One of the disciples comes up to Jesus as He’s praying. I imagine the disciple quietly walking up as Jesus is praying, trying not to make a sound to distract Him. Then, I see that disciple standing, or maybe kneeling, or possibly sitting far enough away from Jesus to respect His privacy, but close enough to where they would be able to talk when Jesus is done. And honestly, this disciple may have been close enough to hear the words Jesus was praying. The disciple drops the comparison—can you teach us like John taught his disciples. And the question is specifically about what Jesus had just been doing before this disciple approached Him—praying.

Luke 11:2-4, New Living Translation.

Jesus said, “This is how you should pray: “Father, may your name be kept holy. May your Kingdom come soon. Give us each day the food we need and forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.  And don’t let us yield to temptation.”

So many people throughout history have skipped over the very significant first words in verse 2. Did you catch them?

This is how you should pray.

Jesus never meant for us to simply repeat these words mindlessly. How do I know that? Jesus has several of His prayers recorded in the Bible. All of them are different. Each of them sound more like a conversation than a recitation.

He starts in Luke 11:2 by celebrating the holiness of God and asking for His reign to come soon. He has spent time in worship and instructs us to do the same. In Luke 11:3, Jesus instructs us to simply ask God for what we need. We don’t have to make a big show about it or even apologize or feel guilty for asking. We really don’t like to talk about Luke 11:4. Here, Jesus points out we should ask God to forgive us in the same way we forgive others. I’m not even close to as good as God is with grace and forgiveness. But that is who I am supposed to be imitating. Finally, at the end of that verse, Jesus tells us to ask God to help us not give in to temptation. It sees like Jesus was simply trying to tell us to keep it normal. Yes, respect God when you talk with Him. But just be yourself and have a conversation. Nothing is too crazy or too boring when it comes to prayer.

PERSONAL CHALLENGE

Talking with God should be part of your everyday life.

It’s not bad to set aside specific times to pray or to have places you like to go to pray. After all, we just found Jesus in a specific place praying by Himself. But, we need to be finding time in our everyday lives to talk to God. But sometimes knowing what to pray about can still be confusing. Well, to put it simply, here are three big general topics you can use when you pray.

1. You should think about the last day, week, or month, and thank God for how He has helped you, cared for you, or just reminded you of His presence in your situation.

2. Since God knows everything, it’s okay for us to let down our guard a bit and humbly ask Him questions. Ask God to help you, whatever that looks like. When Jesus faced important or hard decisions, He went to God in prayer. We should really do a better job of imitating Jesus on this!

3. Ask God to forgive your sins. Be specific. Tell God where you missed the mark. If you follow and believe in Jesus, your sins are paid for. But being a believer also means that you are striving to live a holy life. Not perfect, but holy!

We don’t need to make prayer a complicated, arduous ritual, but instead we can make it just a simple conversation with our Saviour who loves us. I want to encourage you right now to take 5 minutes to pray, and comment any prayer requests down below so that we can pray for you too.

Grumbling and complaining is all around us; at home, at work, in the grocery store, on the news, and all over social media. It can feel good to be grumpy about the things that are not going our way and making ourselves the centre of our cranky universe. Sometimes we just want to embrace the misery and feel righteous in our discontentment, especially when we can give a list of reasons as to why we deserve to feel this way.

Let’s quickly break down grumbling and see if it can be just a moment of complaining and not that big of a deal or if it something more harmful and we need to be actively combating.

Firstly, kids and grownups grumble for the same reasons; we have an unmet expectation or desire and we are not happy about it. These expectations and desires can be; realistic or unrealistic, in or out out of our control, something we were supposed to get or something we think we deserve. We often grumble when we see someone get something we want or think we deserve, also when we have a plan and it gets changed without our permission.

Think about complaints that we hear in public, what are they about and when do they happen? A kid wants candy and a parent says no, someone wants to use an expired coupon and they can’t, the main road is closed and people have to take a detour, someone wanted an ice coffee and they’re out of ice, the library closes in 5 minutes and they aren’t ready to leave.

Cambridge Dictionary defines grumbling as “to complain about someone or something in an annoyed way” Thesaurus.com recommends synonyms or replacement words such as; ‘moan’, ‘wail’, ‘find fault’, and ’gripe’. The word and the action are not passive or in the grey area. To grumble is to take a negative stance in your attitude and in the posture of your heart.

Psalm 106 is a story that illustrates the consequences and road that grumbling leads us down. It looks back to the Israelites in the desert and how they allowed grumbling into their hearts and it created discontentment, distrust, and ultimately destroyed the promises that God was waiting to fulfill for them.

Psalm 106:24-25: “Then they despised the pleasant land; they did not believe his promise. They grumbled in their tents and did not obey the Lord.” God gives them the choice to praise Him, to follow His direction, to choose to see the goodness in their lives and have a posture of thanksgiving. The Israelites didn’t choose God, they chose to grumble and see their lives through the lens of unmet expectations and unfulfilled desires. God gives them over to their choice and the Israelites destroy their relationship with God, they leave Him behind and chase lives where they simply do whatever they want to try to meet those expectations and desires.

Grumbling isn’t simply the words that we use when we are unhappy with the situation, but rather it’s a heart posture which tells God that we are willing to trust in His plan and aren’t content with how He’s doing things. The good thing is that both the Bible and Thesaurus.com have an answer as to what the opposite of grumbling is and what positive actions are required to counter the grumbling; ‘compliment’ and ‘praise’.

Later in Psalm 106, the Israelites turn back to God, they praise Him, they compliment Him, and they give Him thanks for the things that He did for them. These actions of trust and the changing of their hearts’ posture brings healing to their relationship with God and sets them on a path to trusting in God’s plan and reaping the benefits of being aligned with God’s will.

Since we know the story of the Israelites, we know that this did not all happen in a weekend or even within the same year. This story happened over years and generations, there were time periods where grumbling overwhelmed and their relationships with God were fractured and consequences were harsh. There were also time periods where individuals or the entire nation chose praise and thanksgiving, which created strong relationships with God and the benefits of His fulfilled promises.

So grumbling is not simply complaining, it is a slippery slope that harms our relationship with God and leads us into distrust of God’s plan. Here are two practical ways that we can counter grumbling by choosing a positive reaction to unmet expectations or desires.

Default Gratitude
It takes time to make gratitude your default; to make your first reaction to everything thanksgiving. It is possible, but it requires time and help. Work together as a family to come up with phrases or a routine that you can use to reinforce gratitude when grumbling begins. This could be a gratitude jar or journal, thank-you notes on items that cause grumbling (for example on the t.v. as a reminder to be grateful to God for the time that they got to watch their show and not grumbling for more time), a song to sing together when feeling discontent with an outcome, or anything that works for you and your family. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says, “Rejoice always,  pray continually,  give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

Practice Praise
A habit of praise takes time to develop and for children they will follow your lead. Praise can be as simple as when you step outside and aloud exclaim “God, look at the leaves, you made today so beautiful!” It can also be more structured where you sit down with your kids and pray with the focus on praising God, or worshiping as a family. The more you praise the Lord in your heart, the more you will praise Him in front our your children, and then the more that they will praise Him. Psalm 9:1: “I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.”

Gratitude and praise do not get rid of disappointment or frustration when things don’t go the way that we wanted, but choosing these positive actions instead of the negative actions will change our hearts and lead us into a deeper relationship with God. They are active choices that will take work in our hearts and habits.
Lastly, as you work on your grumbling, not only will you be reaping these benefits but you will also be more prepared to help your children through their grumbling. You will be able to lead them into a better heart posture and point them in the direction of a deeper relationship with their Lord.

Examples
Sometimes it can feel difficult to know how to start changing our habits and helping our kids, here are a few phrases that can be used and adapted as needed.

I understand that you are feeling disappointed about ______. How can we thank God for all the good things that just happened?

It is okay that we are upset that ____ is over, can we take a minute and tell God all the amazing things we can see around us right now?

God I am amazed at the world around me, I want to praise and thank you for _____.

Thank you God for allowing us to do this fun thing _____, please help us to remember the good parts and not be disappointed that it is over.

Think about all of the great things that God has given you, do you need anything else, or just want it? Can we list 12 things that God has blessed us with and thank Him for His love.