Forgiveness is one of the most challenging things we’re ever asked to do. When someone hurts us deeply, the pain can feel like a wound that never quite heals, no matter how much time passes. It’s natural to feel anger or even hatred toward those who have wronged us, and letting go of those feelings can seem impossible. After all, doesn’t forgiving them mean they’re getting away with what they did? Doesn’t it minimize the harm they caused?
The truth is, forgiveness isn’t about excusing someone’s actions or pretending everything is fine. It’s not about forgetting the pain or acting like we were never hurt. Instead, forgiveness is a choice to release bitterness and refuse to let anger control our hearts and minds. It’s an act of strength, not weakness, and it frees us from the poison of resentment that can consume our lives if we let it.
Forgiveness is also rarely a onetime decision. For many of us, it’s a process we have to revisit over and over, especially when memories of the hurt resurface. Some days, we might feel like we’ve moved on, only to find ourselves overwhelmed by anger or sadness the next. That doesn’t mean we’re failing; it means we’re human. Forgiveness takes time, prayer, and often the help of trusted friends or counsellors.
What’s more, forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation. There are times when relationships can’t or shouldn’t be restored, especially when someone is unrepentant or unsafe. Even then, forgiveness is about freeing ourselves from carrying the weight of someone else’s actions.
As Christians, we’re called to forgive as we’ve been forgiven (Colossians 3:13). Jesus showed us the ultimate example of forgiveness on the cross. We don’t forgive because it’s easy, or because the other person deserves it, but because God first forgave us. And in choosing to forgive, we open our hearts to healing and peace that can only come from Him.
